motherhood

Being a mom is tough. Society places so much pressure on us to be perfect, it’s easy to beat ourselves up when we fall short. But the truth is, we all make mistakes – big and small. It’s time to start owning our Mom Fails. Not only is it important for our own growth and learning, but it sets a positive example for our children.

At the end of this article, I tell you with details my biggest #momfail story EVER. But first, let’s discuss why reframing failure as a learning opportunity, practicing self-compassion, building a support system, modeling failure as a positive thing, and teaching our children to embrace failure is so essential.

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Let’s face it, we’re all just real moms trying to do our best. So, let’s embrace the power of our mom fails and learn from them.

Reframing Failure As A Learning Opportunity

One way to shift our mindset about mom fails is to see them as opportunities for growth and learning. Instead of beating ourselves up about what we could have done better, we can reframe our failures as valuable experiences that teach us how to do better next time. This perspective can be incredibly empowering, and it sets a positive example for our children by showing them that it’s okay to make mistakes.

To fully embrace this mindset, we need to practice self-compassion. It’s easy to fall into the trap of negative self-talk and self-blame when we mess up, but that only makes us feel worse. Instead, we can approach our mistakes with kindness and understanding, recognizing that we’re all human and we all make mistakes. By treating ourselves with compassion, we can learn from our failures without feeling overwhelmed by shame or guilt.

Practicing Self-Compassion

To fully embrace the idea of owning our mom fails, we need to practice self-compassion. It’s natural to feel disappointed or frustrated when we make a mistake, but we shouldn’t beat ourselves up over it. Instead, we can approach our failures with kindness and understanding, acknowledging that everyone makes mistakes. By treating ourselves with compassion, we can move past our mistakes and grow from them.

This mindset of self-compassion sets the foundation for building a support system that can help us own our mom fails. With the help of family, friends, or even online communities, we can share our experiences and learn from others’ mistakes. A support system can provide the encouragement and reassurance we need to try again and keep going.

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Building A Support System

This mindset of self-compassion sets the foundation for building a support system that can help us own our mom fails. With the help of family, friends, or even online communities, we can share our experiences and learn from others’ mistakes. A support system can provide the encouragement and reassurance we need to try again and keep going.

Having a strong support system can also help us feel less isolated and alone in our struggles. It’s easy to feel like we’re the only ones who make mistakes or fall short sometimes, but the truth is that every mom has her own set of challenges and failures. By connecting with other moms who are going through similar experiences, we can gain perspective and feel less alone.

Additionally, a support system can provide practical help and resources. Whether it’s a friend who offers to watch the kids so we can take a break or an online group that shares helpful tips and advice, having a network of support can make a big difference in our ability to handle the ups and downs of motherhood.

With all of these benefits, it’s clear that building a support system is an important part of owning our mom fails. On the plus side? You’ll get a bit of self-care time for yourself too!

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Modeling Failure As A Positive Thing

In addition to having a support system, there is another important aspect of owning our mom fails – modeling failure as a positive thing. When we show our children that it’s okay to make mistakes and that failure is a natural part of the learning process, we not only help ourselves grow but also teach them a valuable lesson.

Modeling failure as a positive thing means reframing our perception of failure. Instead of seeing it as a setback or a reason to feel ashamed, we can view it as an opportunity to learn and grow. By sharing our failures and the lessons we’ve learned with our children, we can help them develop a growth mindset and a healthy relationship with failure.

For example, instead of hiding our mistakes from our children, we can openly discuss them and talk about what we can do differently next time. This not only models resilience and problem-solving skills but also shows our children that mistakes happen to everyone and that it’s okay to try again.

But let’s take a closer look at how we can teach our children to embrace failure and develop a growth mindset.

Teaching Your Children To Embrace Failure

Encouraging our children to embrace failure is one of the most important things we can do as parents. Instead of shielding them from failures and mistakes, we need to teach them that it’s a natural part of life and a valuable learning opportunity.

One way to foster this mindset is by modeling it ourselves. Children learn by watching, and when they see us handling failure with grace and resilience, they will be more likely to do the same. It’s important to remember that our words and actions have a powerful impact on their perception of failure.

Another way to teach our children to embrace failure is by reframing how we talk about it. Rather than using phrases like “I failed” or “I’m no good at this,” we can shift the narrative to focus on the learning experience. For example, we can say “I made a mistake, but I learned from it and will do better next time.”

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We can also encourage our children to take on challenges and try new things by praising their effort and hard work, rather than just their accomplishments. When a child receives praise for their efforts, they are more likely to view failure as a stepping stone towards success, rather than a roadblock.

Teaching our children to embrace failure and develop a growth mindset is an ongoing process that requires patience and persistence. But by taking small steps every day, we can help them become confident, resilient, and successful individuals who are not afraid to take risks and learn from their mistakes.

In conclusion, owning our mom fails is not only important, but it’s also necessary for growth and learning. By reframing failure as a learning opportunity, practicing self-compassion, building a support system, modeling failure as a positive thing, and teaching our children to embrace failure, we can create a positive example for our children and teach them the valuable lesson that failure is a normal and necessary part of life. Remember, being a real mom means embracing imperfection and using our mistakes as opportunities for growth. As the writer C. S. Lewis once said, “Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.” So let’s embrace our mom fails and use them as guideposts to a more fulfilling and rewarding motherhood experience.

My Biggest Mom Failure Ever

So I never shared this with you. Mostly because I felt like a giant idiot. In fact, it was 8 months ago and I still feel like a giant idiot.

So it was Christmas Eve. My hubby was working and I was home with the kids. I was still packing because we were leaving in the morning to go to Michigan for Christmas. The kids are playing and daydreaming of Ipads, Legos and American Girl Dolls in their head as I am packing and getting ready for our trip.

Isaac enters the room and says he isn’t feeling well and asks if I will cuddle with him. Ummm yah! Do you ever say no to a cuddle wanter?

Especially when they are an 8 year-old-boy? No of course not! You drop everything and get your cuddle on. Meanwhile Kayla is in the craft room making a mess creating a masterpiece.

So I go over to Kayla and tell her Bubs isn’t feeling well and that we are heading upstairs to lay down for a bit. So, Kayla, knee deep in crayons and markers understands where we are heading.

Thirty minutes later the cuddle bug got antsy and decided enough was enough. So he heads downstairs.

One minute later he comes back upstairs, because lets be honest, cuddling led to mommy laying there like a bump on a log still warm under the covers, and says he can’t find Kayla. I tell him to look in the basement. It makes no logical sense that Kayla isn’t in the house.  2 minutes later he comes up and says he still can’t find her.

Irritated I have to get up, I go downstairs and start yelling her name. And that is when I see it…the front door is slightly open. I try not to freak because it is completely unlike Kayla to leave the house without telling me. Plus it is friggin cold outside. She wouldn’t go outside.

So I continue to scream her name. Nothing. I am upstairs, downstairs, and then back upstairs again. At this point I start flipping on lights, checking in drawers, closets, and any small space she can fit. I even opened the refrigerator door. Isaac is freaking. I am trying to stay calm but he can tell by my voice I am FREAKED OUT!

After 10 minutes of this shenanigan I call Tim and say “You need to come home.  I can’t find Kayla. She is missing and the door was opened.”

He tries to get more clarification. And I simply change the tone of my voice and say INEEDYOUHOMENOW. A normally 10 minute drive takes him 3 minutes to arrive at the door.

And then I call the police.

There is just no logical explanation for where she is. She would never leave the house. Never. She wouldn’t be hiding somewhere. Not when she hears the urgency in my voice. The only thing I could come up with is someone entered our house and took her.

I can’t possibly see any other situation. There is no way she is in the house. I screamed her name from every square inch of the house.

So Tim comes home and starts the screaming business. I am kind of frustrated because we should be out searching for scary men who take children not screaming her name in our house. I already did that.

And that is when we hear her little voice…from upstairs…in her room, where I had checked and screamed.

Wha?  Was she hiding from me? I am gonna spank her until next week. Tim runs upstairs and there is the drippy, sweaty, burning up with a fever little girl who had decided she wasn’t feeling well so she went under a blanket and fell asleep.

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Then the doorbell rings. Hi Mr. Policemen. No I am not an idiot. Yes, we found my daughter. She was um…sleeping.  #momfail

We all have them.

We understand.

Truly.

10 “Failed As Mom” Quotes

  1. “Being a mother is one of the hardest jobs in the world, but also one of the most rewarding. Don’t forget to celebrate all the small victories along the way.”
  2. “You are doing an amazing job, even when it feels like you’re not. Your love and dedication to your family is admirable.”
  3. “Remember that you are not alone. There are so many other moms out there who are going through the same struggles and triumphs as you are.”
  4. “You are the heart and soul of your family. Your children and loved ones cherish you more than you know.”
  5. “Every day may not be easy, but every day is an opportunity to make a positive impact on your children’s lives. Keep going!”
  6. “You are capable of handling anything that comes your way. Trust yourself and your instincts as a mother.”
  7. “Don’t forget to take care of yourself, too. Your well-being is just as important as your family’s.”
  8. “The love and patience you show your children will shape them into the amazing individuals they are meant to be. Keep up the great work!”
  9. “You are strong, resilient, and capable of overcoming any obstacle that comes your way. Keep pushing forward, mama!”
  10. “Being a mom is a tough job, but you are tougher. You’ve got this!”

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7 Comments

  1. When we were building our home I had to take our three girls shopping to look for kitchen cabinets. I didn’t think it would take that long because I thought that when you pick out cabinets you also get them in the stain/color you see and the hardware. Once I picked out the cabinets I was asked what color of stain and hardware we wanted…this took much longer than I thought it would. Anyhow…the two older girls (bored as they were) stuck with me and when we were getting ready to leave I could not find our youngest. Sales people and actually everyone in the store was trying to help me find her. As my panic level increased a cabinet door (that is on display on the floor) pops open with one small child inside. I guess she decided to make her own entertainment. Didn’t know if I wanted to hug her or spank her.

  2. I did nearly the same thing to my parents once, except I took a feverish, heavy nap in the middle of a game of hide & seek so I was between the back of the couch and the wall.
    I get that panicky feeling with my own kids if it takes more than 5 seconds to find them – & I walk around with the phone in my hand ready to push the “emergency” button, so I totally understand!

  3. Oh man!!! Of course, you were so relieved that she was just right there the whole time, but it’s definitely a little humiliating when you have everyone else involved in looking for her. Glad she was okay!

  4. Bless your heart! We had a similar incident once (well, just shy of the police part) and it was the most horrible time of our lives. No shame, just life!

  5. I realize this post is older… so maybe my off topic story will be okay! Many years ago, before my husband and I had kids, he woke up in the middle of the night and couldn’t find me anywhere. He went around the house a few times yelling my name and came back up to the bedroom flipped on the lights and started to get dressed to call the police. I woke up and asked him what in the world he was doing– I was still in bed! It would make sense if I was a tiny person but I am most definitely am not! His sister got him a headband with a light on it- like a miners cap- for the next time this happened. I am, needless to say, a very deep sleeper!

    I will never forget the time I couldn’t find my three year old. All I could see was the front door open and the sound of a car zooming off. Thankfully, it was just the mail delivery truck taking off and she had run out to get the mail. In those brief moments before I found her, I really thought I was going to lose my mind. Glad your experience had a happy ending as well!

  6. Hi Chris! Yikes! That’s the scariest feeling, isn’t it? And, can you imagine if your husband had called the police and you were right there in the bed? Ha! Thanks for your stories!

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