If you missed this story you can begin here and read all the way through. It is amazing story of forgiveness, redemption and rebuilding. Here is our last installment.
One of my favorite passages of Scripture is Micah 7:8…Do not gloat over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will rise. Though I sit in darkness, the LORD will be my light.
For several weeks you have been introduced to my wife. You’ve followed along with her as she has shared our story and many of you have encouraged her through your comments and prayers. And because of that, I say, “thank you.”
I would like to introduce myself to you. I would love to give you some grand introduction, but I can’t.
My name is Patrick. I’m full of tattoos, I like micro brews, and yes, I was unfaithful to my beautiful wife. Yep that’s me! How’s that for an introduction? I will forever carry the scarlet “A” on my chest for the rest of my life (tats as well).
I would have never imagined in a bazillion years that I would tell people that I have been unfaithful, but I was. I allowed the enemy to have his way with my life. And that’s really where it all began. The addiction to porn, the selfishness, the lack of respect for anything, led to me making some very bad decisions. Decisions that would change the course of my family. How could this happen to me? I had been in the ministry for over 18 years. Starting from being a Youth Minister all the way to being one of three people who had planted a church in Arizona. How could this happen? I have an amazing wife and 2 children that I adore. I believe that one word can describe why…pride! I was invincible, or I thought. I could do anything and get away with it, or I thought. Little did I know that all that was a lie. The enemy had me right where he wanted me.
I’m not proud of what I did. I’m not proud of what my decisions did to my wife and to my children. But what I am thankful for is grace. I taught it, preached it and even studied it. I thought I knew just what it was. I truly understand what grace looks like now and what it is! I am a changed man. I have owned my sins, faults and have taken full responsibility for my actions. and sought the forgiveness of many, including the husband of the other family that I almost destroyed. Through counseling, patience and a ton of grace not only by my wife, but also the grace that the LORD gives, I can write this and tell you that I am a changed person.
I have learned through this ordeal what a marriage should look like. What a husband should be. What a dad looks like. Yes, there are days that we struggle, but thank God I have a wife who loves me and cares for me. This hasn’t been easy to say the least. I lost everything I had. My career, many, many friends. But thankfully I didn’t lose my wife and our loveys.
What about you? As you read this and the many posts that Denise has written, where are you? Do you know of people that have or are going through the similar situation that we went through. Are you going through this yourself? If you are, I want to encourage you to seek help. Be honest with yourself and with others. No sin goes unhidden. The best thing you or the person you know is to be painfully honest. No matter how hard it is to hear, honestly has to take place. From there, healing can once again begin.
Denise and I are the best we have ever been. We are learning to communicate better, understand each other better and live life with zest and honesty. I have no idea what the LORD has in store for us in the future. I have no clue if I’ll ever get back into full-time ministry. I can tell you though that when Denise and I get wind of couples who are experiencing the same things in which we went through, we will be there with open arms and a listening spirit. Too many couples are hurting out there with no one to talk to. Too many “believers” turn their head and let them walk alone. That is NOT what we will do. Your are a child of the Most High. You are still loved and still His. You are His beloved! You too will rise from the ashes and once again pronounce from the mountain tops what God has done in you life and the what He’s about to do through you.
Denise and I hope and pray that you’ve been encouraged, moved and challenged through our story. It is our prayer that you along with us can say with confidence…. Though I have fallen, I will rise. Though I sit in darkness, the LORD will be my light.
May God bless you as you travel this road of life. Keep your head held high…His Joy comes in the morning!
I want to thank Patrick and Denise from the bottom of my heart for sharing their story. It takes great courage to do so. This is the first time (of many I am sure) that they got to share their story in a somewhat public way. Thank you for those that have encouraged them and followed along. It has been a blessing to be in their life for the last couple of years. We (Tim and I) are excited to see how God will use this in their life and we are beyond blessed that our lives intertwined on this road of life. To God be the glory!